Throughout the whole of today, I have been receiving several nudges to speak to grandma about mum's health status. I was not sure the whole time whether to do so or not. Frankly all these while I do not have the courage.
When I was with the Worship Team as they were doing their devotion before rehearsal commenced, a brother-in-Christ shared a song which I fell in love with about two years ago in another brother-in-Christ's wedding. Below are the words:-
I’m Held By Your Love
Verse 1:
I’m held by Your love, upheld by Your strength.
On Your shoulders You bore me, by Your faith I stand.
Cherished by You Lord, treasured in Your sight,
so close to Your heart, held firm in Your hand.
Chorus:
So awesome is Your love, so mighty is Your hand.
On eagles’ wings You carry me, Your grace shall be my strength.
So perfect is Your love, You sacrifice Your Son,
amazing love reached out to me, with joy to You I come.
Verse 2:
Not by my wisdom, not by my strength.
Gently You guide me, lead me by hand.
Total surrender, Jesus I am Yours;
now and forever, in Christ I now stand.
If I am still leading worship this Sunday, this song will be one of my choices. The words reminded me that I am held by God's love. On eagle's wings He will carry me and His grace shall be my strength. It was the words of the second verse that gave me the courage to speak to grandma because I am assured God will gently guide and lead me by hand.
On my way home, I prayed and asked the Lord to help me. When I stepped into the house, I went to grandma's room and told her I wanted to speak to her.
We sat on her bed. I whispered a quick prayer and broke the news to her. When she heard about it, grandma cried and said it was all her fault. I did not understand that comment she made but I listened on.
She shared that in the past she had been cursing at people (including her children and other loved ones) whenever there were quarrels and all. Now she said the curses have come through - one by one, her immediate family members have gone before her: first, her husband; then her son; then her younger daughter and now her eldest daughter is sick.
My heart went out to her as I could see the pain in her. I pleaded with the Lord to give me words of comfort and breakthrough as I sensed this is probably the time she needs to release all her regrets and guilt she has been carrying all these years.
I told grandma that the day she accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Saviour, her sins have been cleansed because of His death on the cross. I told her she is no more under the bondages of sin and death. I also affirmed in her that she has been set free.
She acknowledged what I said but she mentioned that it has been very painful to go through death upon death when she should be the one to go. I know it will take a while for grandma to be healed of her past experiences. It is my prayer the Lord will truly cause a breakthrough in her.
I explained to grandma that mum's medical condition is not severe and that it is curable so long as she goes through the treatments as advised by the specialist. I told her this is the period for her, dad and I to pray for mum's recovery.
We prayed together after that. She cried as she asked the Lord to heal her only daughter. As she prayed those words, I have this peace and assurance that mum would be healed - simply for the sake of grandma. I do not know. I may be wrong but I kind of sensed that the Lord will not be so heartless as to take away the last of grandma's flesh and blood. Well, I guess time will tell.
She wanted to speak to mum but she has slept already so I told grandma to do so tomorrow. I wish I could do more for grandma. It is my prayer that she will be able to sleep tonight. Sigh.
Well, I shall stop here. I am drained myself. I really need God's extra portion of strength for this period. I hope He will pull me through it all.
"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit. Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God. You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you. Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory." Romans 8:1-17
"The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights." Habakkuk 3:19a
When I was with the Worship Team as they were doing their devotion before rehearsal commenced, a brother-in-Christ shared a song which I fell in love with about two years ago in another brother-in-Christ's wedding. Below are the words:-
I’m Held By Your Love
Verse 1:
I’m held by Your love, upheld by Your strength.
On Your shoulders You bore me, by Your faith I stand.
Cherished by You Lord, treasured in Your sight,
so close to Your heart, held firm in Your hand.
Chorus:
So awesome is Your love, so mighty is Your hand.
On eagles’ wings You carry me, Your grace shall be my strength.
So perfect is Your love, You sacrifice Your Son,
amazing love reached out to me, with joy to You I come.
Verse 2:
Not by my wisdom, not by my strength.
Gently You guide me, lead me by hand.
Total surrender, Jesus I am Yours;
now and forever, in Christ I now stand.
If I am still leading worship this Sunday, this song will be one of my choices. The words reminded me that I am held by God's love. On eagle's wings He will carry me and His grace shall be my strength. It was the words of the second verse that gave me the courage to speak to grandma because I am assured God will gently guide and lead me by hand.
On my way home, I prayed and asked the Lord to help me. When I stepped into the house, I went to grandma's room and told her I wanted to speak to her.
We sat on her bed. I whispered a quick prayer and broke the news to her. When she heard about it, grandma cried and said it was all her fault. I did not understand that comment she made but I listened on.
She shared that in the past she had been cursing at people (including her children and other loved ones) whenever there were quarrels and all. Now she said the curses have come through - one by one, her immediate family members have gone before her: first, her husband; then her son; then her younger daughter and now her eldest daughter is sick.
My heart went out to her as I could see the pain in her. I pleaded with the Lord to give me words of comfort and breakthrough as I sensed this is probably the time she needs to release all her regrets and guilt she has been carrying all these years.
I told grandma that the day she accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Saviour, her sins have been cleansed because of His death on the cross. I told her she is no more under the bondages of sin and death. I also affirmed in her that she has been set free.
She acknowledged what I said but she mentioned that it has been very painful to go through death upon death when she should be the one to go. I know it will take a while for grandma to be healed of her past experiences. It is my prayer the Lord will truly cause a breakthrough in her.
I explained to grandma that mum's medical condition is not severe and that it is curable so long as she goes through the treatments as advised by the specialist. I told her this is the period for her, dad and I to pray for mum's recovery.
We prayed together after that. She cried as she asked the Lord to heal her only daughter. As she prayed those words, I have this peace and assurance that mum would be healed - simply for the sake of grandma. I do not know. I may be wrong but I kind of sensed that the Lord will not be so heartless as to take away the last of grandma's flesh and blood. Well, I guess time will tell.
She wanted to speak to mum but she has slept already so I told grandma to do so tomorrow. I wish I could do more for grandma. It is my prayer that she will be able to sleep tonight. Sigh.
Well, I shall stop here. I am drained myself. I really need God's extra portion of strength for this period. I hope He will pull me through it all.
"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit. Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God. You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you. Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory." Romans 8:1-17
"The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights." Habakkuk 3:19a
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