I was at the hospital this morning for a medical review and also to have the dressings changed. First things first, praise the Lord that the biopsy result turned out negative. That was a sigh of relief as I was not sure how the whole thing would turn out.
I was ready to accept the fact that the doctor would tell me that I have stomach cancer. I was telling my sister yesterday that I actually bargained with God that should He will that I have this illness that it must not be now as I still need to take care of my parents and grandma.
Well, I guess God answered my prayers and also my sister's.
Anyway, I was encouraged to go for a more thorough check-up to ensure that I am really clear of the disease. Initially I told my sister that I would consider doing it but after spending a considerable amount of time praying, I decided not to go for it. I would want to believe that God has heard my prayers and I should claim that in faith.
The whole morning was filled with anxieties and uncertainties. When I got home, I just slumped on my bed as I did not sleep well the whole night. After resting for a while, I decided to just close my room door and spend the time praising God with my guitar.
I sang and sang and this is one of the longest session I had with God, just praising His name, reading a portion of the Bible, praying and being still before Him.
The message I received during that communion with God was this: If God is pre-eminent in my life, my desires must never supersede His will. They must be in line. How true that is!
I was just reflecting on the past few months and I realised this statement makes so much sense. During that period of struggle, I was always running ahead of God. I hardly prayed first before making any decisions. I just acted on impulse. Then when things did not turn out the way I wanted them to be, I got angry with Him and the people around me. I hardly sought the counsel of my siblings-in-Christ whom I respect. I just went ahead with my feelings.
What resulted in all these are disobedience to God, who has been there trying to prevent all these from happening, burnt-out, frustration, bitterness, resentment, anger... basically all the negative things one can think of.
I told God I want to re-align my life to His will so that in doing so, there will be no more strife but peace knowing that I am resting on His promises: that He is ahead of me leading the way; beside me to guide; behind me to push me when I am losing steam; above me to protect; in me to give that peace and assurance that He is in control.
I also took the time to pray for my family and other loved ones whom I hold so dearly in my heart. I prayed the same prayer that their lives will also have God first. I asked Him to give them the thirst and hunger to read His Word, to pray, to be still before Him and to praise. When they are able to do all these, every trouble or uncertainty or strife or burden will pale in comparison to what God can do mightily in and through them.
In closing I want to share a posting which a brother-in-Christ from another church shared on his FaceBook page: "He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. Jesus be the centre." Such simple words but a powerful and assuring statement!
Hallelujah! :)
"He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together." Colossians 1:17
I was ready to accept the fact that the doctor would tell me that I have stomach cancer. I was telling my sister yesterday that I actually bargained with God that should He will that I have this illness that it must not be now as I still need to take care of my parents and grandma.
Well, I guess God answered my prayers and also my sister's.
Anyway, I was encouraged to go for a more thorough check-up to ensure that I am really clear of the disease. Initially I told my sister that I would consider doing it but after spending a considerable amount of time praying, I decided not to go for it. I would want to believe that God has heard my prayers and I should claim that in faith.
The whole morning was filled with anxieties and uncertainties. When I got home, I just slumped on my bed as I did not sleep well the whole night. After resting for a while, I decided to just close my room door and spend the time praising God with my guitar.
I sang and sang and this is one of the longest session I had with God, just praising His name, reading a portion of the Bible, praying and being still before Him.
The message I received during that communion with God was this: If God is pre-eminent in my life, my desires must never supersede His will. They must be in line. How true that is!
I was just reflecting on the past few months and I realised this statement makes so much sense. During that period of struggle, I was always running ahead of God. I hardly prayed first before making any decisions. I just acted on impulse. Then when things did not turn out the way I wanted them to be, I got angry with Him and the people around me. I hardly sought the counsel of my siblings-in-Christ whom I respect. I just went ahead with my feelings.
What resulted in all these are disobedience to God, who has been there trying to prevent all these from happening, burnt-out, frustration, bitterness, resentment, anger... basically all the negative things one can think of.
I told God I want to re-align my life to His will so that in doing so, there will be no more strife but peace knowing that I am resting on His promises: that He is ahead of me leading the way; beside me to guide; behind me to push me when I am losing steam; above me to protect; in me to give that peace and assurance that He is in control.
I also took the time to pray for my family and other loved ones whom I hold so dearly in my heart. I prayed the same prayer that their lives will also have God first. I asked Him to give them the thirst and hunger to read His Word, to pray, to be still before Him and to praise. When they are able to do all these, every trouble or uncertainty or strife or burden will pale in comparison to what God can do mightily in and through them.
In closing I want to share a posting which a brother-in-Christ from another church shared on his FaceBook page: "He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. Jesus be the centre." Such simple words but a powerful and assuring statement!
Hallelujah! :)
"He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together." Colossians 1:17
No comments:
Post a Comment