When I was on my way home in a cab from supper with some siblings-in-Christ after the Worship Team rehearsal, I was just pondering whether it is okay to be hard on myself when I play the drums for the Sunday service.
Of course, the word "motive" comes to mind. Well, allow me to share why I wrote the above paragraph. During the band practice in church, I was struggling with one song which required me to play a drumming sequence. The struggle was that I was not able to keep to the consistency and the feel of the whole sequence was not there. I appreciated the rest of the team members trying to help me but I was still unable to fully grasp the song. Of course my frustration showed as I did not want to hold every one up and also to break the confidence of the whole team.
Anyway, we did not practice the song after a few failed attempts and we went on to the rest of the pieces.
It affected me so much that I was not really in a talking mood when I was eating with the rest at Chomps Chomps Food Centre.
Back to the word "motive" - well, I know in my heart that I want to give my best for the Lord in my playing. I was hard on myself as I did not want to take the whole practice session too lightly and also knowing that if my drumming sequence goes haywire on Sunday, I will be throwing everyone in the team and the congregation off.
I feel bad because I do not want my incompetence in this area to affect every one hence I am not exactly feeling very great now.
Well, one lesson I did learn from here was this - when I was struggling, I depended very much on my human understanding and ability to deal with it. I guess I could have asked God to help but I allowed my frustration to get the better of me.
I apologised to the rest of the team for all that had happened. I thank God for the grace shown towards me and the encouragement they gave in reply to my sms.
That said, it is my prayer that the Lord will guide my hands, feet and mind as I struggle through this one song. I know He will help me. The problem is sometimes I forget He is always there to assist.
For those who know me and are reading my blog, please keep me in prayer as I prepare to serve God this Sunday at the 11:15am service.
I guess I am tired too - it has been a long day. I was with the youths, who have committed to the TRACkers programme that I mentioned about in my previous blog, till noon at Bedok Methodist Church. We had an overnight retreat and I was with them since last evening.
I left the retreat for a briefing for my reservist stint which will be for the next two weeks. It started at 2pm and ended about 4pm.
I headed for church after that though I did think of going home first. I decided against the idea as the bed would have been too tempting. If I had napped, I probably may not have the desire to go out of the house again.
Anyway, I shall stop here and go to bed. My conclusion to the question I asked myself at the beginning of this blog - I guess it is okay to be hard on myself when I am serving the Lord in the Music Ministry but I must not forget that I have to depend on my God Almighty to lead and guide me accordingly.
Good night.
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men..." Colossians 3:23
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
Of course, the word "motive" comes to mind. Well, allow me to share why I wrote the above paragraph. During the band practice in church, I was struggling with one song which required me to play a drumming sequence. The struggle was that I was not able to keep to the consistency and the feel of the whole sequence was not there. I appreciated the rest of the team members trying to help me but I was still unable to fully grasp the song. Of course my frustration showed as I did not want to hold every one up and also to break the confidence of the whole team.
Anyway, we did not practice the song after a few failed attempts and we went on to the rest of the pieces.
It affected me so much that I was not really in a talking mood when I was eating with the rest at Chomps Chomps Food Centre.
Back to the word "motive" - well, I know in my heart that I want to give my best for the Lord in my playing. I was hard on myself as I did not want to take the whole practice session too lightly and also knowing that if my drumming sequence goes haywire on Sunday, I will be throwing everyone in the team and the congregation off.
I feel bad because I do not want my incompetence in this area to affect every one hence I am not exactly feeling very great now.
Well, one lesson I did learn from here was this - when I was struggling, I depended very much on my human understanding and ability to deal with it. I guess I could have asked God to help but I allowed my frustration to get the better of me.
I apologised to the rest of the team for all that had happened. I thank God for the grace shown towards me and the encouragement they gave in reply to my sms.
That said, it is my prayer that the Lord will guide my hands, feet and mind as I struggle through this one song. I know He will help me. The problem is sometimes I forget He is always there to assist.
For those who know me and are reading my blog, please keep me in prayer as I prepare to serve God this Sunday at the 11:15am service.
I guess I am tired too - it has been a long day. I was with the youths, who have committed to the TRACkers programme that I mentioned about in my previous blog, till noon at Bedok Methodist Church. We had an overnight retreat and I was with them since last evening.
I left the retreat for a briefing for my reservist stint which will be for the next two weeks. It started at 2pm and ended about 4pm.
I headed for church after that though I did think of going home first. I decided against the idea as the bed would have been too tempting. If I had napped, I probably may not have the desire to go out of the house again.
Anyway, I shall stop here and go to bed. My conclusion to the question I asked myself at the beginning of this blog - I guess it is okay to be hard on myself when I am serving the Lord in the Music Ministry but I must not forget that I have to depend on my God Almighty to lead and guide me accordingly.
Good night.
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men..." Colossians 3:23
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
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