Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Pride - Is It That Important?

I was looking forward to going home just about an hour ago because mum bought "Yu Sheng" for the family but just one remark made by dad spoilt the whole atmosphere. This is also where some weaknesses of mine are still there for me to overcome.

I am not ashamed to share this because it is a real struggle. Though life is not bad generally, there will be times when it yields the ugly side but when dealt with it correctly and with God's help, the journey still goes on and eventually it will be well again.

What happened just now could have been overcome if all practised patience but obviously my dad and I did not. This one incident also showed how childish humans can be at times.

We were tossing the Chinese salad with raw fish, a dish only served during the Lunar New Year, when I accidentally spilled some. It was meant to spill actually as it signifies blessings overflowing but it was not my intention to do so at that time. Anyway, dad said something which I felt injustified and I told him it was not done on purpose. Because of that, he stopped tossing and just looked in my direction as if I have said something vicious or rude to him.

Of course things added up when my bro got agitated and started saying things which insinuated as if I should not defend myself when something wrong is said against me. Then as usual, things of the past were brought out and that pumped fuel to the raging fire already roaring in the kitchen.

I had to bring every one back to how the whole thing started and it was due to one insensitive remark made. After that I went to my room.

I cannot deny that when dad said something which was totally untrue, my pride got the better of me and I went on an offensive mode. I could have practised self-control which at that point of bursting out, I knew I should have done that but obviously the opposite happened.

Now as I reflect on the above-mentioned, Would the whole outcome have been different if I had not tried defending myself. Probably. We could have carried on with the tossing and eating. I just needed to swallow my pride and be patient at that time but of course I did not.

Well, I will explain to dad at another time why I reacted the way I did and apologise to him if I sounded rude towards him. I also need to speak to my bro to share with him why I reacted.

Anyway, I did not plan to have this happened but it did. It basically reminded me to be more sensitive and careful because a simple word or remark can affect someone else.

What a way to end the day.

"It is not good to eat too much honey, nor is it honorable to seek one's own honor. Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control." Proverbs 25:27-28

"A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense." Proverbs 19:11

"The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride. Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools." Ecclesiastes 7:8-9

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