Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Be Original; Not Modified!

After work I went to Ngee Ann City to visit some of my Coffee Bean friends. I also decided to head for the cafe to do some stuff for two of my siblings-in-Christ's wedding at the end of this month - the couple whom I met last night. I was supposed to meet another couple tonight but it has been postponed to Saturday.

Anyway, in the midst of doing my work, I needed to answer nature's call and off I went to the restroom. As I entered the toilet, I noticed one individual standing in front of the mirror which kind of made me wonder whether the person was a he or a she.

Out of curiosity, I decided to pay more attention to that individual. The first thing I tried to observe was the Adam's apple and I found none of that. The person was above the age of twenty and by right, the Adam's apple should be rather obvious. The next thing I took notice of was the breast area and they are bigger than a normal male's. The individual is definitely not a body-builder as the size of the person was slim.

With that, I approached her and she was startled when I asked her a couple of questions about her gender. She then went on an offensive mode and said it was not my business whether she was a male or a female. I said it had to be my business and the business of the rest of the guys in the loo if she was really a female. Already her voice gave her away.

She wanted to leave the restroom. Before she could do that, I gave her a very stern warning never to enter a male toilet again. She kept quiet and walked on. As she was just about out of the loo, I told her to love herself as who she was originally born to be. She may be a butch but she is after all a lady.

I made the above confrontation because first of all, it is wrong for the opposite gender to use the toilet of another. The offence is the same as that of a male using a female toilet. I also wanted the lady to be reminded of who she really is. She may try to be a male but like it or not, she can never be one for several obvious reasons. I made the statement on loving herself because she has to. If not, she will always try to be someone she is not and that is not healthy for her in the long run.

I prayed for the lady as I headed back to the cafe and it saddened my heart to have encountered the above incident. Lately there have been many news on gays and lesbians in Singapore. When I read about them, my heart was heavy. There are the majority who are against these practices and there are some who are supportive of them. Every one can argue for all they want on this topic but to me, I basically have one thing to say - every individual must love the him or her that he or she is originally designed to be.

It is as simple as me accepting the look I have now as I stand in front of the mirror. If I do not love the me I see, then I will always be insecure. I can change the appearance of Andy Chew by going for plastic surgery and all but if I do not love the original me, I will always be living in the shadow of the facade I have created.

There were many times when I lost confidence in myself or felt lousy of myself when I hear from friends commenting about my size or about my receding hairline or heard from someone else telling me of what another person said of my built. There were a couple of times when I decided to do something about it by exercising and trying to lose weight and applying some hair lotion. After trying so hard to gain the acceptance of others, I felt it was wrong.

Yes, it is good to lose weight for the sake of health but if I am doing it for other reasons, then it is not healthy (spiritually and mentally) anymore as I am pursuing something to please the people who made those remarks. Whatever happened to the inner me? Isn't that more important? In the end, I realised the pursuit to be a more handsome Andy Chew was futile and decided to put a stop to it.

All said - we simply just have to love ourselves. Period. I hope I make sense.

Anyway, Chin Chuan, whom I shared before in my previous blogs, came by my table and have a chat with me. He was about to go home after finishing his shift. In our conversation, he updated me about his eye infection and the eye-drop that was prescribed to him when he visited the doctor. He said it is better now. He then told me that he was very tired and that tomorrow will be a long day as he had to work from 11am to 11pm. I advised him to rest well tonight and he smiled at me. Anyway, I prayed for him when he left.

I also had a couple of chats with the rest of the staff. One of the managers also came by to say hi. I was quite curious for having not seen her for a while. I asked her about it and she told me she was in Japan for a month to attend a course. She shared with me about her experience during the stay - it was interesting to listen to her account.

Well, after I was done with the wedding stuff, I headed for Plaza Singapura Shopping Centre to visit a pet-shop. I needed to buy some supplements for my doggy. This princess is really more fortunate than some human beings I have come across.

Anyway, I thank God for today's pilgrim's journey and the lessons I have learnt in all the encounters I have shared above.

To God be all thanks and praise!

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you." Psalm 139:13-18

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