In the morning I reflected on a familiar passage taken from Psalm 139. The focus for my retreat today is me.
After reading all 24 verses, I am thankful to God for who I am because I am fearfully and wonderfully made by Him. I am also glad that I have been made in God's image based on yesterday's passages from Genesis 1 to 3.
When I was pondering on the words "fearfully and wonderfully," I was just curious as to why these two words. I did not refer to any guides but when I just closed my eyes and kept still, I basically felt good about being Andy Chew because deep down in my heart I was grateful to God that He took pains in creating me. In God's assembly plant, if there is such a thing, I am not the same as His other creations. I am already a masterpiece in itself. I am unique.
As I reflected further, this other word came to mind - "undefiled." When I entered this world I was basically pure.
Throughout the passage, I was also reminded that God is the Author of my life. He knows my every move; thought; word - He basically knows me inside out but He has never been a dictator.
He basically gives me the freedom to live my life in this fallen world. From an undefiled little baby to who I am now, I am constantly exposed to the teachings of the world but I have a choice whether to follow them or not. Sad to say, many times I do.
Does God condemn me for having rebelled against Him? No. Instead He gave me and everyone else Jesus Christ, who died on the cross for our sins, so that we can choose to come back to Him - to be cleansed and made pure once more. Again He gave me a choice.
Now that I am a child of God, I cannot just live my life as if I am still totally in charge of it. This is where I need to include Him in all that I say and do - hence the verses which read, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." (Psalm 139:23-24)
The above thoughts are just relevant to me as I reflected on the passage. I guess it may not necessarily be the same for others.
Anyway, in the afternoon I went to the same cafe to do the second part of the retreat where I had to answer a few questions on my strengths, weaknesses, pet sins and calling. Again I thought it would have been easy since I have known myself for 39 years. How difficult can that be, right? Well, again I was wrong. I struggled because many times I do not want to know the dark side of my life.
I posted this on my FaceBook after I completed the questionaires, "Deliberately taking time to reflect on me today can be a scary thing... it is either I surrender my all (calling, strengths, weaknesses and pet sins) to God and continue living purposefully or I totally surrender and give up on myself (because the calling, strengths, weaknesses and pet sins are so overwhelming)."
Then my Pastor commented on this posting and she made sense. She said, "Reflection is critical to living." We need to regularly take pit stops in our lives to ensure we do not live life blindly but to do a rain-check once in a while so that we can get rid of what is not beneficial to our life's journey and pursue what is good and right in the sight of God.
As I was quite swamped after answering honestly the four areas of calling, strengths, weaknesses and pet sins, I decided to just leave the cafe and walked around the City Centre to continue my thought process.
Now that it has come to the end of the day, this is my conclusion. I am glad I have been asked to consider my calling and strengths. At least I know why I exist, from now till I die, and I can use my strengths to complement and supplement that calling. Knowing my weaknesses and pet sins are also important not for the sake of just being aware that they are there but to repent from them.
It is also to help me to be always on the watch so that the devil does not use this to affect what God has called me to do and in being a blessing to others.
I also concluded that I cannot do all these by myself. I basically need to be accountable to some siblings-in-Christ. This is where the body of Christ comes in. We must always remember that the Christian journey is never alone. We must always walk with one another. The question is whether we are willing to do that.
Well, that is all for the second day of my retreat.
I am going to sleep early tonight as I would like to do my next day's retreat in Amsterdam. I will take the earliest train out so that I can use the travelling time to do my reflection for tomorrow and also to maximise my time in the capital of The Netherlands.
So much for that. When I was walking around the town area, I basically went to some shops to check out some clothes but I did not buy any as I wanted to survey the prices and also the varieties first. I guess I will only start buying at the end of the week, if any.
Breakfast and dinner were sumptuous as always and I truly thank God for Laurel in always being so diligent in giving her family and I the most yummilicious food. After breakfast I joined Laurel and her two sons, Ben and Isaac, to a flea market to buy some fresh produce. The place was huge and there were just so many things available - from clothes to accessories to vegetables to fruits to fish, etc.
Oh yah, I called home and when grandma spoke to me, she cried. She asked how come I have not been coming home the past few days and whether she had offended me. Because of her dementia, she forgets that I am away hence her thoughts just ran wild. I guess I will call home regularly to assure her that she is not being neglected. I guess this is the least I can do for her. Praise God mum and dad are fine. So are the hammies, love-bird and doggy. :)
That's all.
Good night, everyone!
After reading all 24 verses, I am thankful to God for who I am because I am fearfully and wonderfully made by Him. I am also glad that I have been made in God's image based on yesterday's passages from Genesis 1 to 3.
When I was pondering on the words "fearfully and wonderfully," I was just curious as to why these two words. I did not refer to any guides but when I just closed my eyes and kept still, I basically felt good about being Andy Chew because deep down in my heart I was grateful to God that He took pains in creating me. In God's assembly plant, if there is such a thing, I am not the same as His other creations. I am already a masterpiece in itself. I am unique.
As I reflected further, this other word came to mind - "undefiled." When I entered this world I was basically pure.
Throughout the passage, I was also reminded that God is the Author of my life. He knows my every move; thought; word - He basically knows me inside out but He has never been a dictator.
He basically gives me the freedom to live my life in this fallen world. From an undefiled little baby to who I am now, I am constantly exposed to the teachings of the world but I have a choice whether to follow them or not. Sad to say, many times I do.
Does God condemn me for having rebelled against Him? No. Instead He gave me and everyone else Jesus Christ, who died on the cross for our sins, so that we can choose to come back to Him - to be cleansed and made pure once more. Again He gave me a choice.
Now that I am a child of God, I cannot just live my life as if I am still totally in charge of it. This is where I need to include Him in all that I say and do - hence the verses which read, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." (Psalm 139:23-24)
The above thoughts are just relevant to me as I reflected on the passage. I guess it may not necessarily be the same for others.
Anyway, in the afternoon I went to the same cafe to do the second part of the retreat where I had to answer a few questions on my strengths, weaknesses, pet sins and calling. Again I thought it would have been easy since I have known myself for 39 years. How difficult can that be, right? Well, again I was wrong. I struggled because many times I do not want to know the dark side of my life.
I posted this on my FaceBook after I completed the questionaires, "Deliberately taking time to reflect on me today can be a scary thing... it is either I surrender my all (calling, strengths, weaknesses and pet sins) to God and continue living purposefully or I totally surrender and give up on myself (because the calling, strengths, weaknesses and pet sins are so overwhelming)."
Then my Pastor commented on this posting and she made sense. She said, "Reflection is critical to living." We need to regularly take pit stops in our lives to ensure we do not live life blindly but to do a rain-check once in a while so that we can get rid of what is not beneficial to our life's journey and pursue what is good and right in the sight of God.
As I was quite swamped after answering honestly the four areas of calling, strengths, weaknesses and pet sins, I decided to just leave the cafe and walked around the City Centre to continue my thought process.
Now that it has come to the end of the day, this is my conclusion. I am glad I have been asked to consider my calling and strengths. At least I know why I exist, from now till I die, and I can use my strengths to complement and supplement that calling. Knowing my weaknesses and pet sins are also important not for the sake of just being aware that they are there but to repent from them.
It is also to help me to be always on the watch so that the devil does not use this to affect what God has called me to do and in being a blessing to others.
I also concluded that I cannot do all these by myself. I basically need to be accountable to some siblings-in-Christ. This is where the body of Christ comes in. We must always remember that the Christian journey is never alone. We must always walk with one another. The question is whether we are willing to do that.
Well, that is all for the second day of my retreat.
I am going to sleep early tonight as I would like to do my next day's retreat in Amsterdam. I will take the earliest train out so that I can use the travelling time to do my reflection for tomorrow and also to maximise my time in the capital of The Netherlands.
So much for that. When I was walking around the town area, I basically went to some shops to check out some clothes but I did not buy any as I wanted to survey the prices and also the varieties first. I guess I will only start buying at the end of the week, if any.
Breakfast and dinner were sumptuous as always and I truly thank God for Laurel in always being so diligent in giving her family and I the most yummilicious food. After breakfast I joined Laurel and her two sons, Ben and Isaac, to a flea market to buy some fresh produce. The place was huge and there were just so many things available - from clothes to accessories to vegetables to fruits to fish, etc.
Oh yah, I called home and when grandma spoke to me, she cried. She asked how come I have not been coming home the past few days and whether she had offended me. Because of her dementia, she forgets that I am away hence her thoughts just ran wild. I guess I will call home regularly to assure her that she is not being neglected. I guess this is the least I can do for her. Praise God mum and dad are fine. So are the hammies, love-bird and doggy. :)
That's all.
Good night, everyone!
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