Friday, July 31, 2009

Live To Die

I had a very good sleep just now. I cannot say it was a nap as I dozed off for more than two hours. I woke up much fresher and alert. The past few days have been trying and draining having again to deal with mum's ill-health and also matters at home. Everything is always linked and when I mention "matters at home" - that means having to calm grandma down and assure her that everything is fine; making sure that dad has enough rest; etc.

I had to get out of the house once in a while as it helps to keep my sanity intact, basically to just be away from the stress I sometimes face at home. I have to confess it can be very straining both mentally and emotionally.

It is not that I am trying to control everything with my own strength. It is just that the human side of me has its limits though I know clearly God is in charge.

I cried out to God again before I slept last night that every one in the family has suffered for the past three months. I pleaded with Him to have mercy on my parents, grandma, brother and me. I requested of God to help carry the load as I could see the strain already on my dad and grandma. My brother and I are feeling it too but being younger, I guess it is easier for us to handle though at times we feel like giving up too.

Since last Sunday, I have come across so many incidents of deaths and friends falling sick: last Sunday, a dear brother-in-Christ's mother passed away because of cancer; yesterday another brother-in-Christ lost his mum to cancer too; today, a member of the Children's Ministry Vacation-With-A-Purpose team had to mourn the passing of her dad, also to cancer. Then last Sunday I was informed of one of my Missions Committee member suffering a stroke while he is in China. Thank God he is back in Singapore for treatment and has been discharged today. Another dear brother-in-Christ, who is a missionary, had to come back for a medical examination due to an infection of his legs. Even the online seller whom I bought my handphone battery and screen protector had to deal with some funeral arrangement at home hence his inability to send out the items I bought on time.

While I was praying for the above persons, I learnt one thing. As much as there is life after death for Christians, I learnt that in our transition here on earth, we basically live to die. Yet many times, many of us (myself included) live as if there is no end here. We are pursuing earthly treasures as if we can store them forever in our barns here on earth but forgetting that we entered this world with nothing and so the same when we depart.

I hope and pray that we will not sell our souls to what is temporal and forget that there are much to live for when in eternity.

Sorry for my reflective mood today but sickness and death always reminds me of the above thoughts. I guess that is one way God speaks to those who are still living.

Anyway, I visited mum this afternoon and am glad she is looking well. Dad got it wrong when he told me yesterday that mum would be transferred to Singapore General Hospital today. What it should have been is that mum will go there for her future medical check-ups after her discharge as her renal specialist is posted there.

I came home early to make sure grandma is okay. I praise God that she is.

Okie, time to sleep again.

Good night, all! Many thanks to those who have been praying for mum. :)

"For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." Philippians 1:21

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. "The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness! "No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." Matthew 6:19-24

"And he told them this parable: "The ground of a certain rich man produced a good crop. He thought to himself, 'What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.' "Then he said, 'This is what I'll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I'll say to myself, "You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry." ' "But God said to him, 'You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?' "This is how it will be with anyone who stores up things for himself but is not rich toward God." Luke 12:16-21

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